How we are...

Oh my oh my, where on earth do I start? Life has been so up and down the last few months. We have moments of pure joy and clarity and then we slide straight down the roller coaster at pace to serious lows. Hormones are at maximum level, which ensures emotions are on point. At the very centre feels to be me. Trying to navigate everyone’s emotions, love everyone completely and be kind enough to myself to be a better version than I feel I’m being of myself. 

Of late I could literally run from the house and never look back. I know it’s so wrong, but if I’m honest, I’m sure I’m not alone in feeling like this sometimes. Being a parent isn’t always perfect insta photos and rainbows. It’s sometimes just crazy hard. Hard because you love these humans so much it hurts when they are being just plain horrible to you. 

I think these feelings are made even harder when people tell me how lovely our girls are. How we are raising amazing humans and that we should be so proud. Don’t get me wrong, who doesn’t want to here your kids are being good, yet having someone tell me I should write a book about how to get your kids to be amazing, was a little shock. This request was hard not to laugh at as I knew that only moments before I was losing my ever loving crap about one them about their behaviours. 

It is a bit of a double edge sword, because it makes me stupidly happy the girls are good for other people. Present themselves correctly and show respect and have manners, yet on the other hand, I’d love to not have to be the angry Mum always yelling at them to stop being shit humans to me or each other. 

So here in lies where we are. We are sitting in a limbo of almost repeating the same conversations daily and it’s wearing me down. I really hate sounding like I’m moaning but I feel like I need someone to give me some different ideas on how to get off the roller coaster, to maintain an even footing on life and have just a few more rainbows than dark stormy clouds.