A moment in time to cry

We had a weekend away last weekend. It was cold and wet and yet it was great. Camping with my family and I forgot for a Moment what was really happening in our lives. Forgot that things aren't fantastic. Just plain forgot or I just froze to the core of not being able to think. 

Yet here it is. 

No business, no home, no income. 

Reality. It's amazing how quickly it sets back In without the distraction. It sucks to have to remember it. To have the stress just go from zero to 100 from nothing. Your head just can't handle it. It struggles with the change. Well my head does anyway. It struggles with any form of stress nowadays. 

Things are stressful as the funds get down to nothing and no sign of when any relief is in sight. The hardest part is looking at the girls and knowing they understand things are bad but they are still that. Kids. Kids who don't need to know how bad things are. Why we can't go out to dinner. Why they can't get that box of cereal because it's just not fitting in the budget. 

I hate this. I hate it more that it's happening in a public arena where people have there own story of what's going on in our lives. I hate going up to the shops because the first question you get it how long til your shop opens back up. I can't answer it anymore. I just can't. It's not just a matter of cleaning up and opening up. Everything is ruined and the way the hits keep coming. There won't be anywhere near enough money to reopen. 

I want to scream at people. I want to tell them where to go. Times are tough, even though my chin is up, which it always is as being down causes a double chin! I'm just sad and I think today I needed to wallow. 

Tomorrow I hope is better.